Everything Happens for a Reason: How Celiac Disease Saved my Girlfriend's Life.
I know what you're thinking. The title of this blog post is sooooooo cliche, isn't it? Well, yes. I have to agree, but there really isn't another appropriate title for this post. It just fits.
This isn't going to be a post about God or religion or Christianity or whatever in general. Whatever you believe is fine by me. Some may say this is God's work, others will simply say "The universe provides." As for me and my family, we believe in God. But, that's neither here nor there. I simply want to talk about everything leading up to this point and how thankful I am that everything happened the way that it did.
Let's start with the present day. Liz was just diagnosed with a pretty aggressive stage 2 cervical cancer. Now, lets talk about why I'm feeling thankful, optimistic, and overall happy about this. Weird, right? You'll understand by the end of this post; I promise.
Since Liz moved to Florida, we have been in and out of hospitals, mainly for her Celiac Disease and gluten attacks from cross contamination. But, there has also been another underlying problem that we have been dealing with for months... she has been suffering from intermenstrual bleeding for over seven (possibly even eight) months now. We lost count, to be honest. This has resulted in a severe case of anemia. On January 1st, 2013, just after the midnight NYE celebrations, we were in the hospital preparing for her first two blood transfusions of the year. Those were followed by another two transfusions in April, and finally four more just this week. Each time she was hospitalized and given blood, she was examined. At first, we were told that she was bleeding internally. Then, we were told it was caused by the intermenstrual bleeding. They did scans, they did pelvic exams, they did smear tests, they drew blood; I mean, the list goes on and on. I've never known anyone else in my entire life to spend more time at doctors' office visits and hospital stays than she has just in the past year. And still, nothing was uncovered...
But before we get super upset at the medical profession, let me interject here that some cancers (mainly those found on the cervix) tend to grow rapidly and spread rapidly, because of the hormones that women have in their bodies by nature. So, while its true - somebody COULD have missed this in previous examinations and hospital stays, I've also read that a cancer of this nature could develop, grow, and spread in as little as two months. This little statistic here is the only thing (and its a very thin thread it's hanging on) that helps me keep a little faith in the health care system.
So why is this blog post entitled "Everything Happens for a Reason," you ask? Simple. Lets look at the events as they've occurred thus far:
Jan 2013 - First two transfusions of the year. Pelvic exams, CT scans, and blood work was done; nothing indicating anything other than uterine fibroids. Unsure as to the source of the bleeding. Could be internal. She was sent home and told to follow up in a few months.
April 2013 - Second two transfusions of the year. Repeat all of the above exams at the same hospital. Same results, except this time, they also considered that the fibroids could be the reason for the blood loss and the intermenstrual bleeding. She was told to follow up with an OBGYN.
Between April and June, she saw her PCP various times, had numerous labs run, and went to an OBGYN who put her on the pill to control the bleeding. The pill didn't help. The following month, they put her on the depo shot. That made the bleeding much worse. The next thing that was discussed was a hysterectomy. But, the OBGYN she was seeing at the time did not handle those procedures, so he referred her to a different one. She called and made an appointment right away for either the end of June or early July. I honestly can't remember at this point. But, she missed the appointment due to a miscommunication with the appointment dates and the next available date was in September (the fourth, my birthday, to be exact.)
The last scan she had done was in April 2013. The last pelvic exam was in June 2013.
August 4-8: I was away on a business trip to St. Louis. Liz was feeling sick during this time and complaining a lot about stomach cramps. When I came home, I really tried to get her to go to the hospital, but she didn't want to because she knew we were going to Chicago the following week and she didn't want to be hospitalized.
August 14: We flew out to Chicago. My best friend was getting married in Indiana on the 17th, so we planned on staying at my cousin's house one night (14th) and with my best friend the 15th and 16th to help with wedding preparations. Then, after the wedding, we were going to stay in a hotel one night in Indiana before heading back to Chicago for a few days to just enjoy the city as tourists. We stayed at my cousin's house that night and decided that we would just stay there every day until we left for Chicago on the 18th. [Sidebar: I'm not one to deviate from plans, especially on vacation. I like to know exactly what I'm doing and where I'm staying before I leave home.]
August 15th: We did some wedding things and visited with family as well.
August 16th: Liz was not feeling well, so she slept at my cousin's house for the greater part of the morning and I was off to do wedding things during the day and came back to get ready for the rehearsal dinner that night.
August 17th: My other cousin came to visit and told me about this really neat restaurant in Chicago and recommended that I take Liz there. [Sidebar: Again, all of my plans were pretty much set in stone at this point. But, the restaurant was beautiful (online) and I just decided to change some things around and made a last minute reservation for the following evening.] We went to the wedding that night and we had a great time. We went back to my cousins to get some rest and head to Chicago the next day to start OUR vacation.
August 18th: After several family visits, we drove to Chicago. We met up with more friends there and took an architectural boat tour. Then, that evening, we went to dinner at the Signature Room on the 98th floor of the John Hancock building. The views were breathtaking. The food was underwhelming. The service was decent. The reaction she got to gluten from being cross contaminated was disappointing, and so was the $180 we spent that night. But, did I mention that the views were breathtaking? Oh yes - and the memories we made that night were priceless. <3
August 19th: Liz was feeling really sick (gluten reaction) and I again changed things around to make her more comfortable. We stayed at the gorgeous Waldorf Astoria while in the city and that day we just decided to enjoy our hotel. We went in the hot tub, we went to the pool, we lounged in our room by the fire place, we ate, and we just simply relaxed and enjoyed our hotel stay.
August 20th: We flew back home. Poor Liz was having a hard time even walking around at this point from the severe pains she was getting in her abdomen. I was ready to just be home with her and take her to the hospital. We got home pretty late that night, picked up Bella, and brought her home.
August 21-23: Liz refused to go to the hospital. She was resting well at home, but I could tell she was low on blood. She was having a really hard time getting around the house.
August 24: Early in the morning, Liz caved. She almost passed out on me again, and I finally called rescue. They came and picked her up and took her back to the same hospital she was treated at in January and April. Once again, her hemoglobin was so low, they set her up to receive another two units of blood.
August 25: There was an OBGYN on staff that day that wasn't a doctor she had ever seen before. Her chart still showed the name of the old doctor who referred her out (the one who did not do hysterectomies,) so the OBGYN on staff didn't want to step on his toes and advised Liz to wait for him. After having a conversation with the nurse about how she wasn't really his patient anymore, they called that OBGYN back and she came to see Liz. She was very nice, very thorough, and very good. She did a pelvic exam and told Liz that she thought she felt a polyp. She set up a room and told Liz that she would try to remove it; sometimes with a little twist, the polyps come right out. So, as she tried to get it out, it broke in her hands. She pulled out the piece and realized it was NOT a polyp; but rather an unknown mass. She sent it directly to the lab with a rush order. She told Liz that she was very concerned with the size of the mass and that her fear would be that it could be cancerous. She assured her that she would make sure she would rush the results back to her and that she would come back to give her the results herself - even though she was off the next day.
August 26: Our worlds came crashing down. The doctor was true to her word. She came in on her day off and sat with Liz and told her that the mass was cancerous. Liz has cervical cancer. She put in an immediate transfer to the cancer institute. That day, she was transferred. That night, two other doctors came in and each gave her a pelvic examination. Just by the exam, they gave us a ballpark of stage 2; but they were highly concerned because of the size of the mass and how far it had spread already. They needed a PET scan to rule out any further spreading to the lymph nodes or colon or lungs. As if the news weren't bad enough, we still had to wait another day for definite answers.
August 27: the PET scan was done in the morning. We waited all day for results. Finally, that evening, the results came back. The cancer was indeed spreading, but it was still contained to one general area. Stage 2 was the final staging, but because of how far it had already spread, surgery was no longer an option. If they tried to cut it out at this point, they would have to leave a part of it behind. When cancer is cut, it tends to spread much faster. With this already being an aggressive cancer, we can't take that risk. It would have to be treated with chemo and radiation.
August 28 (today): The goal was to get Liz ready for chemo and radiation this week. But, in order to do that, her blood levels have to be really good. So, this morning, they gave her another two units of blood making this her seventh and eighth blood transfusions this calendar year.
OK - so again - why does everything happen for a reason? Simple:
Liz had numerous tests, scans, labs, and procedures done this year through June. If cancer was already lurking, it wasn't noticed. Since it wasn't noticed, it was probably at a stage 0 at that point. This means that it went from stage 0 to stage 2 in just a couple of months.
The OBGYN that Liz was referred to had access to her records and her chart. He was already aware that he was taking over the case from this other doctor to basically handle the hysterectomy due to the intermenstrual bleeding caused by fibroids. There was no need for repeat scans; everything was current and in the database. So, lets say that Doctor B would have seen her as a new patient in June/July, pulled up her most recent (within 14 days) scans, and discussed the hysterectomy and scheduled the procedure for another month down the road. This takes us to the current month. We already know we have stage 2 cancer growing there and the dangers of cutting out some and leaving the rest behind because it is a very aggressive form. She would have had a hysterectomy, some cancer could have been left behind, and it could have spread very rapidly to other organs and even her bones. So, the miscommunication with the receptionist on that original appointment date (though frustrating at the time) was actually a good thing.
Then, while we were on vacation, we changed our plans to stay at my cousin's house for a few days. I am NOT the type to change plans; especially last minute. It gives me anxiety to not have a definite plan. I like to be on time to things and I like to follow lists and plans. It's my OCD side. But, for some reason, I was super flexible with changing our plans. And, if it weren't for me staying at my cousin's house, then I would have never had the chance to sit and visit with the other cousin who referred me to the restaurant... the restaurant where Liz got cross contaminated, which (although super frustrating at the time) led to the severe reaction she was getting that landed her in the hospital, where they then treated her for the anemia, where she was seen by a new doctor - a fresh set of eyes - who discovered her cancer. So, see? Everything does happen for a reason. If Liz didn't have Celiac Disease, she wouldn't have gotten sick in Chicago. She wouldn't have had to go to the hospital for the gluten attack. She would not have gotten checked out until next month when her next lady exam was due, and by then we could be looking at a stage 3 or 4 cancer. This is why I say Celiac Disease saved my girlfriend's life. This is why I say that I am so thankful and happy that we are dealing with a contained stage 2 cancer. This is why I'm so happy things happened the way they did... because instead of a 20 or 30 percent chance, I'm now hanging on to a 60 percent or greater chance at being able to buy my girlfriend a shirt that says "I made cancer my bitch" when she beats it.
We will beat this thing. I'm optimistic. I know we have God, the universe, the vibes, the angels, the whatever you want to call it in our corner; because we are good people, we are good together, and we deserve this amazing gift of life to last a lot longer than just one year together. We have plans and goals and babies waiting for us in the future. We have grand babies to kiss one day when we're old and we didn't wait around ten years to come together just to let cancer win. We will win.
And when my girlfriend is known as a cancer survivor, I will marry her legally, even if it means I have to move to a different state. Whatever it takes. This is my forever. <3
This isn't going to be a post about God or religion or Christianity or whatever in general. Whatever you believe is fine by me. Some may say this is God's work, others will simply say "The universe provides." As for me and my family, we believe in God. But, that's neither here nor there. I simply want to talk about everything leading up to this point and how thankful I am that everything happened the way that it did.
Let's start with the present day. Liz was just diagnosed with a pretty aggressive stage 2 cervical cancer. Now, lets talk about why I'm feeling thankful, optimistic, and overall happy about this. Weird, right? You'll understand by the end of this post; I promise.
Since Liz moved to Florida, we have been in and out of hospitals, mainly for her Celiac Disease and gluten attacks from cross contamination. But, there has also been another underlying problem that we have been dealing with for months... she has been suffering from intermenstrual bleeding for over seven (possibly even eight) months now. We lost count, to be honest. This has resulted in a severe case of anemia. On January 1st, 2013, just after the midnight NYE celebrations, we were in the hospital preparing for her first two blood transfusions of the year. Those were followed by another two transfusions in April, and finally four more just this week. Each time she was hospitalized and given blood, she was examined. At first, we were told that she was bleeding internally. Then, we were told it was caused by the intermenstrual bleeding. They did scans, they did pelvic exams, they did smear tests, they drew blood; I mean, the list goes on and on. I've never known anyone else in my entire life to spend more time at doctors' office visits and hospital stays than she has just in the past year. And still, nothing was uncovered...
But before we get super upset at the medical profession, let me interject here that some cancers (mainly those found on the cervix) tend to grow rapidly and spread rapidly, because of the hormones that women have in their bodies by nature. So, while its true - somebody COULD have missed this in previous examinations and hospital stays, I've also read that a cancer of this nature could develop, grow, and spread in as little as two months. This little statistic here is the only thing (and its a very thin thread it's hanging on) that helps me keep a little faith in the health care system.
So why is this blog post entitled "Everything Happens for a Reason," you ask? Simple. Lets look at the events as they've occurred thus far:
Jan 2013 - First two transfusions of the year. Pelvic exams, CT scans, and blood work was done; nothing indicating anything other than uterine fibroids. Unsure as to the source of the bleeding. Could be internal. She was sent home and told to follow up in a few months.
April 2013 - Second two transfusions of the year. Repeat all of the above exams at the same hospital. Same results, except this time, they also considered that the fibroids could be the reason for the blood loss and the intermenstrual bleeding. She was told to follow up with an OBGYN.
Between April and June, she saw her PCP various times, had numerous labs run, and went to an OBGYN who put her on the pill to control the bleeding. The pill didn't help. The following month, they put her on the depo shot. That made the bleeding much worse. The next thing that was discussed was a hysterectomy. But, the OBGYN she was seeing at the time did not handle those procedures, so he referred her to a different one. She called and made an appointment right away for either the end of June or early July. I honestly can't remember at this point. But, she missed the appointment due to a miscommunication with the appointment dates and the next available date was in September (the fourth, my birthday, to be exact.)
The last scan she had done was in April 2013. The last pelvic exam was in June 2013.
August 4-8: I was away on a business trip to St. Louis. Liz was feeling sick during this time and complaining a lot about stomach cramps. When I came home, I really tried to get her to go to the hospital, but she didn't want to because she knew we were going to Chicago the following week and she didn't want to be hospitalized.
August 14: We flew out to Chicago. My best friend was getting married in Indiana on the 17th, so we planned on staying at my cousin's house one night (14th) and with my best friend the 15th and 16th to help with wedding preparations. Then, after the wedding, we were going to stay in a hotel one night in Indiana before heading back to Chicago for a few days to just enjoy the city as tourists. We stayed at my cousin's house that night and decided that we would just stay there every day until we left for Chicago on the 18th. [Sidebar: I'm not one to deviate from plans, especially on vacation. I like to know exactly what I'm doing and where I'm staying before I leave home.]
August 15th: We did some wedding things and visited with family as well.
August 16th: Liz was not feeling well, so she slept at my cousin's house for the greater part of the morning and I was off to do wedding things during the day and came back to get ready for the rehearsal dinner that night.
August 17th: My other cousin came to visit and told me about this really neat restaurant in Chicago and recommended that I take Liz there. [Sidebar: Again, all of my plans were pretty much set in stone at this point. But, the restaurant was beautiful (online) and I just decided to change some things around and made a last minute reservation for the following evening.] We went to the wedding that night and we had a great time. We went back to my cousins to get some rest and head to Chicago the next day to start OUR vacation.
August 18th: After several family visits, we drove to Chicago. We met up with more friends there and took an architectural boat tour. Then, that evening, we went to dinner at the Signature Room on the 98th floor of the John Hancock building. The views were breathtaking. The food was underwhelming. The service was decent. The reaction she got to gluten from being cross contaminated was disappointing, and so was the $180 we spent that night. But, did I mention that the views were breathtaking? Oh yes - and the memories we made that night were priceless. <3
August 19th: Liz was feeling really sick (gluten reaction) and I again changed things around to make her more comfortable. We stayed at the gorgeous Waldorf Astoria while in the city and that day we just decided to enjoy our hotel. We went in the hot tub, we went to the pool, we lounged in our room by the fire place, we ate, and we just simply relaxed and enjoyed our hotel stay.
August 20th: We flew back home. Poor Liz was having a hard time even walking around at this point from the severe pains she was getting in her abdomen. I was ready to just be home with her and take her to the hospital. We got home pretty late that night, picked up Bella, and brought her home.
August 21-23: Liz refused to go to the hospital. She was resting well at home, but I could tell she was low on blood. She was having a really hard time getting around the house.
August 24: Early in the morning, Liz caved. She almost passed out on me again, and I finally called rescue. They came and picked her up and took her back to the same hospital she was treated at in January and April. Once again, her hemoglobin was so low, they set her up to receive another two units of blood.
August 25: There was an OBGYN on staff that day that wasn't a doctor she had ever seen before. Her chart still showed the name of the old doctor who referred her out (the one who did not do hysterectomies,) so the OBGYN on staff didn't want to step on his toes and advised Liz to wait for him. After having a conversation with the nurse about how she wasn't really his patient anymore, they called that OBGYN back and she came to see Liz. She was very nice, very thorough, and very good. She did a pelvic exam and told Liz that she thought she felt a polyp. She set up a room and told Liz that she would try to remove it; sometimes with a little twist, the polyps come right out. So, as she tried to get it out, it broke in her hands. She pulled out the piece and realized it was NOT a polyp; but rather an unknown mass. She sent it directly to the lab with a rush order. She told Liz that she was very concerned with the size of the mass and that her fear would be that it could be cancerous. She assured her that she would make sure she would rush the results back to her and that she would come back to give her the results herself - even though she was off the next day.
August 26: Our worlds came crashing down. The doctor was true to her word. She came in on her day off and sat with Liz and told her that the mass was cancerous. Liz has cervical cancer. She put in an immediate transfer to the cancer institute. That day, she was transferred. That night, two other doctors came in and each gave her a pelvic examination. Just by the exam, they gave us a ballpark of stage 2; but they were highly concerned because of the size of the mass and how far it had spread already. They needed a PET scan to rule out any further spreading to the lymph nodes or colon or lungs. As if the news weren't bad enough, we still had to wait another day for definite answers.
August 27: the PET scan was done in the morning. We waited all day for results. Finally, that evening, the results came back. The cancer was indeed spreading, but it was still contained to one general area. Stage 2 was the final staging, but because of how far it had already spread, surgery was no longer an option. If they tried to cut it out at this point, they would have to leave a part of it behind. When cancer is cut, it tends to spread much faster. With this already being an aggressive cancer, we can't take that risk. It would have to be treated with chemo and radiation.
August 28 (today): The goal was to get Liz ready for chemo and radiation this week. But, in order to do that, her blood levels have to be really good. So, this morning, they gave her another two units of blood making this her seventh and eighth blood transfusions this calendar year.
OK - so again - why does everything happen for a reason? Simple:
Liz had numerous tests, scans, labs, and procedures done this year through June. If cancer was already lurking, it wasn't noticed. Since it wasn't noticed, it was probably at a stage 0 at that point. This means that it went from stage 0 to stage 2 in just a couple of months.
The OBGYN that Liz was referred to had access to her records and her chart. He was already aware that he was taking over the case from this other doctor to basically handle the hysterectomy due to the intermenstrual bleeding caused by fibroids. There was no need for repeat scans; everything was current and in the database. So, lets say that Doctor B would have seen her as a new patient in June/July, pulled up her most recent (within 14 days) scans, and discussed the hysterectomy and scheduled the procedure for another month down the road. This takes us to the current month. We already know we have stage 2 cancer growing there and the dangers of cutting out some and leaving the rest behind because it is a very aggressive form. She would have had a hysterectomy, some cancer could have been left behind, and it could have spread very rapidly to other organs and even her bones. So, the miscommunication with the receptionist on that original appointment date (though frustrating at the time) was actually a good thing.
Then, while we were on vacation, we changed our plans to stay at my cousin's house for a few days. I am NOT the type to change plans; especially last minute. It gives me anxiety to not have a definite plan. I like to be on time to things and I like to follow lists and plans. It's my OCD side. But, for some reason, I was super flexible with changing our plans. And, if it weren't for me staying at my cousin's house, then I would have never had the chance to sit and visit with the other cousin who referred me to the restaurant... the restaurant where Liz got cross contaminated, which (although super frustrating at the time) led to the severe reaction she was getting that landed her in the hospital, where they then treated her for the anemia, where she was seen by a new doctor - a fresh set of eyes - who discovered her cancer. So, see? Everything does happen for a reason. If Liz didn't have Celiac Disease, she wouldn't have gotten sick in Chicago. She wouldn't have had to go to the hospital for the gluten attack. She would not have gotten checked out until next month when her next lady exam was due, and by then we could be looking at a stage 3 or 4 cancer. This is why I say Celiac Disease saved my girlfriend's life. This is why I say that I am so thankful and happy that we are dealing with a contained stage 2 cancer. This is why I'm so happy things happened the way they did... because instead of a 20 or 30 percent chance, I'm now hanging on to a 60 percent or greater chance at being able to buy my girlfriend a shirt that says "I made cancer my bitch" when she beats it.
We will beat this thing. I'm optimistic. I know we have God, the universe, the vibes, the angels, the whatever you want to call it in our corner; because we are good people, we are good together, and we deserve this amazing gift of life to last a lot longer than just one year together. We have plans and goals and babies waiting for us in the future. We have grand babies to kiss one day when we're old and we didn't wait around ten years to come together just to let cancer win. We will win.
And when my girlfriend is known as a cancer survivor, I will marry her legally, even if it means I have to move to a different state. Whatever it takes. This is my forever. <3
You are both going to kiss those babies and grandbabies together. Love you! <3
ReplyDeleteAMEN to that. Love you too, Renae.
DeleteGod bless you both, I can't wait to see a picture of Liz wearing her T-shirt!!! I'll be glad to make one for her!! Tara
ReplyDelete