Today Morning...

I took a stand and made our story public several weeks ago, so that I could hopefully make a change in the lives of other same-sex couples who could be facing the same struggles as Liz and I faced with discrimination.  Liz wanted me to make a difference, and I think I did.  What I didn't expect, however, is the outpour of love and support that we received after I did that. Liz and I never did things expecting anything in return. We simply did them because we wanted to do the RIGHT thing always. We never once hesitated about making our story public, because we knew that even though it was potentially too late to make changes that could impact our lives, the changes were necessary. We were both very passionate about ending discrimination against same-sex couples and families, and Liz was so proud of me/us for being able to do our part for our LGBT community.

I'm a hurricane of emotions lately. Between losing Liz and meeting my son and everything in between, its been hard to wrap my head and heart around what exactly I am feeling.  But, one thing that I can distinctly recognize is the overwhelming feeling of gratitude. I could easily sit here and just bury myself in sadness and focus on all that I've lost this year. But, my son needs me to be strong and healthy and positive and to be honest - it makes it easier to focus on the good things I've experienced since last Thanksgiving. Last year, Liz and I spent a quiet Thanksgiving at home, just the two of us.  She was still going through chemo and radiation and wasn't feeling well, so I made us a mini dinner and we just ate it and watched some redbox movies. I'm so thankful to have had that last Thanksgiving memory with her. We enjoyed each other's company and we talked about what we wanted to do for the holidays. We made plans. We made plans that we followed through

My beloved fiancé, my gorgeous partner, my best friend... My sweet Liz - She is now my beautiful angel.  Her face looked so peaceful upon her passing. She had a smile on her face, as if she saw something beautiful before she left us. I thank God for the time I had with her. Before she passed away, I took a nap with her and held her. She was not in any pain, she was not suffering; she just fell into a deep sleep and her heart stopped in her sleep.  I couldn't have asked for a more perfect departure for her.  She truly deserved to go as sweetly as she did.  When she slipped away, my heart shattered and smiled at the same time.  I will forever miss the greatest love I've ever known, but I am at peace because she is no longer suffering.  I envision her with her beautiful hair back just the way she loved to style it. I can see the amazing smile on her face that illuminated the room.  I hear her laughing with the angels and just being free again.  She is perfection and I am so luck